THE BLESSINGS IN DISGUISE

Even after living for almost half a century, there still are things that never fail to bombard me with questions that I have no answers for. Is it me who is always filled with uncertainties and wouldn`t accept the answers because of the way I am thinking? Even that, I am not certain. I feel I am more matured and would accept the reality of an answer even if it makes me uncomfortable. Yes, I think so. Why would I run away from reality anymore? I already know where the run would take me. Nowhere. I would be back in no time because most of the things on the run, I`ve been lucky to experience and didn`t lose my way back.


"Dan Malam Pun Berpesta" - ( a sketch from my early journal )

Maybe "I`ve been there", like they always say but I took things for granted because they had been repetative throughout my life. They sure make me sick each time I snap out of it. After a while I`d realised that everything had been perfectly placed in their appropriate arrangement even without my doing anything. Maybe Ive forgotten. Everything just fell in place like jigsaw puzzles from the sky.

Only one thing new I`ve learned. One thing that I failed to implant inside my brain all these while until now. Sounds so easy that I`ve always took it for granted throughout my whole existence until now. Now I know why some people surrender their self being in solitude of the way of life. An existence. The answer? Well.. I can rest my brain now because I know it is somewhere in the future and when I reach it, I know one thing though. I`ll be smilling from the satisfaction of scratching my ellusive itch all the while. Blessings in disguise.